If i had waited for another ten minutes, things would have taken on a different turn. I most probably would not have to sit here, not knowing what will happen next, allowing insecurities to grip me, and its clutches inflicts anxiousness into my veins, and cause my heart rate to increase tremendously.
Impatience and risk taking has always been a part of me, which led to such disastrous effect. I mean, i should have been more patient and listened to her instructions, but i wanted to take the risk. I am not able to find the logic behind my actions, the best explanation i can give was that i am a risk taker by nature. My temperamental selfishness gave way to love.
Now i will never get to meet her again.

I licked off the blood that flowed from that opened wound. Those wounds throbbed, and the pain they offered came in surges. For one moment they resided, and next they come biting your skin and bones.
I saw Molly, she couldn't care less that the floor was spilled with my red fluid. She ignored me and continue reading her book. I was pissed man, can't she see i am bleeding and am in pain? Was it that difficult to stand up and get some water, first aid, whatever for me, to try to stop that bleeding wound? My anger grew, but i restrained myself, for if i shouted and lose my temper, my wounds might just prove to be more unbearable. I sat still, trying to compose myself, and gathered whatever strength i had left to find the first aid kit. Lets just simply say i am hoping that it would be somewhere in the kitchen. Who knows, this was the first aid kit, its not the first time i am using the first aid kit, to mend those cuts, and we know that i bloody well lost the first aid kit before. How? I do not know.
I continued licking those infected wounds, though infected, i could not stop my thirst for fresh blood, that explained why that broken piece of glass was lying on the table, stained with my precious blood. It felt good to taste blood, better to digest someone else's blood, great to consume an animal's blood.
I stood up and paced towards the kitchen, mouth sucking at the wounds. I don't understand why i keep opening and closing the skin to allow my blood to flow out, only to find another passage to direct the blood back into my body. My hand did the work, but my mind was in a whirl, i could not think straight, too absorbed by my senses, it felt like i am alive, both the pain and ecstasy reminded my existence. Nothing beats that feeling.
'Molly, where is the first aid kit?' i shouted. 'Molly.'
My question remained as it was, and Molly had not moved from her current state of position, the book covering her face.
My eyes drew itself onto the dark sky, and saw the moon and the city left in its rubble, untouched since its destruction. We had nothing to consume but ourselves since they invaded us.
I could not find the first aid kit and was getting desperate, any more loss of blood would result in my loss of life. 'Molly!' i screamed.
Pissed, i walked over to uncover the book from her face, and i saw her distorted face, spilled with blood. Filled with confusion, my eyes would only dart away from the image before me, and it caught sight of a bottle of alcohol.
I must have... I must have...
My mind...I am losing conscious...
I felt the cold hard floor and now my pale skin was painted red...

The pair of wooden wings laid still, lifeless. It was attached to its wooden aircraft, but now it lost its original purpose to existence, dislocated and left on the table. I did not touch those wings again after the tragic occurred, i was too ashamed to bring myself to reconcile and give life to that pair of wooden wings again. Every time i thought of proving myself wrong, to revive the dead pair of wooden craft, i got hesitant, and only focused on the consequences, and to be more exact the pain.
I used to rush home from school every afternoon, locked myself in my room, and strive to finish my creation, my fantasy.
Then it was done, and my hands felt magical, when they held the body of the wooden craft, pretending that it was a real airplane that could fly me to wherever i desired. A plane of my own to fulfill every dream i ever had, with this plane i could do anything, dream of great dreams and know that it would come to pass.
The sense of achievement kept its hold on me for as long as the aircraft held on to its purpose of existence. That was my dream.
That day little brother came into my room and soft as a mouse laid hold of the plane and crept out. I knew and saw what happened, because i was asleeped, but my sharp ears never failed me, and then i pretended to be asleep.
I simply dismissed the thought that anything fatal would happen to the wooden aircraft, to my dream, and decided to share my dream with my little brother.
Yet it came all to quickly, my hopes turned into ashes, as i heard a loud thud, and slowly a faint weeping sound reached my ears. Was little brother hurt? Did he injured himself with that sharp propeller? How i wished that i would have stopped him, but i wanted to share my joy and dream with him, because i loved him. But allowing him to be hurt, and knowing that he might get hurt was surely not what you called love, is it not now called hatred? No i don't hate my little brother, he was so adorable!
I struggled to get out of the blanket that provided warmth, but now kept me captive. I broke free and ran like a captive that received divine grace and freedom.
Little brother sat on the grass, and what was left of the wooden craft was that pair of broken wings. Wooden, stiff, dried and died. The soft whimpering of my little brother's voice and the pain that arose in my throat thrown me into a state of mixed emotions. I felt a whirl inside my stomach, and it was disgusting, i felt like puking!
His hand lifted from its state of rest and pointed down the hill, then he looked up at me, eyes that are filled with tear like crystals, and mouthed out the words, it flew off.
My dream flew off, the remnants and brokenness of the whole incident was simply represented by a pair of broken wooden wings. My creation left, simply by the propelling force of a hand, a smile on the face to see the dream depart, and that smile was not even mine but my little brothers', it then left. My fantasy fell back into reality, so much time was spent to create that fantasy, yet in a matter of minutes in an afternoon like any other afternoons, it decided to loosen its facade and revealed the ugly truth.
But i know i still love my brother, because we both shared the same dream.
I created that dream, and he was the one who saw the dream took flight.
Little brother was nice enough to keep hold a piece of that dream for us to remember we both once shared the same dream and fantasy together.
We both shared the same dream on that beautiful day.

Will accept you, because thats what love requires?
God accepted us, even though we might not suit his preference of music, his fashion sense...but he still accepts us.
So likewise will accept you in whatever knowledge or intelligence that is beyond the physical appearance...so yeah, will take time but still, shall not let it get in the way of my commitment to bless you! HEH...

Stay with her.

Alright. Today wasnt too bad, i think? Neither too good...ZZZ
Cause the tutorials are kinda boring, and have no relevance to whatsoever that is mass communication?
We learnt IT business, marketing, and spent one tutorial on introducing ourselves to the lecturer, so this is all that happened for tutorials and lectures...most of my classmates died of boredom! Some even played CS in class!
then there was a break from 10 - 1...so went town and guess what ate MACS! like ZZZZZ....cause we have macs in SP, and its chepaer there? So like we kinda wasted our trip...and after that we went zara, to look at clothes, my firrst shopping session with my class, heh! Then we went over to borders, and i got myself a mouse that cost 20 bucks, and a crumpler laptop case that cost 80 bucks! Haha, i wasnt too sure of the prices for standard laptop case, and that laptop case look kinda nice, and i saw a laptop case that cost 120 bucks, so i thought that was reasonable price...haha. Its one of those buys, that jsut caught your eye, and you think no further, just buy it! So yeah, half regretted it, then its my first crumpler bag, so i dont exactly mind. YAYEE...and bought are green in colour! WHEE....
Alright i hope there would be better days ahead in terms of the academic side of my life, and i think its pretty easy to score in poly, you just have to be consistent, listen in every class, understand, make good friends with the lecturer, you should be on your way to getting 3.5 and above, then again, its too early for me to say! HAHAH. we will see...

Should watch the show. Because the message is very real, it is the pursuit of love and acceptance... yup
i will give you my best!

What does it take to create an artificial human?

Would you agree with the creation of one?
Would they have talents and gifts?
Would they have definitions and judgments?
Would they have yearnings and desires?
Would they have dreams like we do?
If they do would they chase after their dreams like we do?
Would they have perseverance, determination, fervency, and enthusiasm?
Would their body function like ours?
Would they have character and personaility?
Would they change and be tempremental like us?
Would they favour, accept new knowledge, process, register and learn?
What does it take to make an AI as real as a human?
A mecha as real as orga?
How do you control their intelligence and capability?
How would they behave to ensure that they are unique and unlike any one else?
A creation of their own? A voice of their own? A mind that thinks by its own, where thoughts have perceptions, thoughts that leads to specific actions.

And if they are desinged and built in such a way that they are able to provide a Yes to all my questions, can we accept and treat them like ourselves?
Is it possible for us to love something that is so similar and almost identical to us, yet accept the differences between us and them, and still love them? Love a mechanically made human who has emotions?
And since they are mechanic how can they love then? Has not God consider all this in a blink of an eye, intelligence and logic that took us many centuries to dream of, to fonder with the idea and concept that we are so uniquely, wonderfully and fearfully made?
Is God not the one who drew out your entire life with his bare hands, who planned the path you would take yet allowing freewill because he loves us.
Am i right to say that it is inhuman of God to create an identical you? Someone who looks, sound, thinks, walks, behaves like you? An identical that beholds your destiny and dream?

No one else is like you, you are unique. God didnt make a single mistake in creating you, in drawing and planning out your life. The mistake that you think is, only exists as a mistake because you are unable to accept the truth, the reality, the circumstances that you are facing, you wish to escape the pain, hurt, lies, or maybe even the truth. But when you find the stregth to accept your life, the mistake vanishses.

Love life. Dont compare. Accept the differences.

If any of you wishes to read new posts and am feeling that my blog is dead...feel free to tag and inform me that you would like me to revive my blog. If not i would only post posts as and when i like. Hee