God i know now the extent of giving so much of yourself, and yet all you receive is spits, punches, nails, blood from your head and body, 39 lashes with sharp edges, and having to carry your cross.
Your cross is your pain, bear that pain.
Your cross is your testimony to the world, out of all this pain that i am bearing, i can smile, because i have a cross while others don't, i have salvation while they don't.
God, i don't know to what extent was your pain, but i got a better understanding of it now. Having the whole world to reject you, yet dying for them and their sins, God i understand a little better now, how it felt when Peter betrayed you thrice, its okay God, your pain was still a lot more worse than mine. But God i don''t mind eating the pain, i asked for it, i asked you to give it to me anyway. I know what i meant when i said, God teach me.
God i will fight and push, even in the painest of moments, even if i am forgotten, i know you have not forgotten me. And i know so many times i have forgotten you, and yet you remained faithful.
Thank you for loving me.

I can take this, the more pain, the stronger i am at this. At all this pain.

I should have learn to let go of you.
God, sorry that i gave into temptation, ya it hurts more that way, but is there any point in thinking about all this? God now i realised that you were all along trying to protect me, i was trying to protect what i was trying to keep, stop trusting you for a moment and gave in. God i see, guess whats the point of holding on so tight to it? I have been holding on to tight to it, didn't i? God i know i asked for more pain, and i will not regret over that decision. I wont!

I will not regret my decision, think anyone who regrets over their decisions are people who do no think before they do, and do not see God's hands in their lives. My sympathy goes out to them.

For now, i just hope we both learn a lesson out of this.
I will continue to eat the pain you keep giving me, now who eats more pain and who eats it longer?
Who has more reasons to leave?

Then again, if we are ever going to argue over this, then where is God s love. Now who is forgotten?
Its okay, God remembers me.

Went out with Adam today. Played pool, word search, piano, and listened to music. I am surprised at how my pool skills still remain.There were some shots that made me smile.
I am really sleepy, cause not been eating, tired brain, depriving it of glucose. Not been eating, cause i am fasting, will be doing this till Friday. Shall only eat breakfast, and honestly the breakfast here was never favourable, at least in my opinion.

I am so tempted to turn things around. But guess we both have something to learn.

Found this on a TED video.

CRAP...
Criticisms
Rejections
Assholes
Pressures

God it has not been an easy year, its going to be the second half of the year soon. I've grown a lot, and i am wondering if i have the strength to take any more of your lessons, but i know you are here to hold my hand. God, i am tired, all of us are, keep me in your knowledge and in your hand. Remind me that you remember me. Please remind me that you remember me, and God if i dont hear that from you, please do something to get that into my head.
God keep her safe and sound. God grant strength for us to push and fight even when we are weak. Through your strength, we will be given the opportunity to glorify you. God i dont care about anything now, i am just going to keep my smile, and that is all i need to know. God help me keep my smile.
Hers too.
Let your voice be strength onto my bones.
And let the strength be sufficient for me to pull us through.

Not easy leading, am still learning, but God hold my hand, so i can hold hers.
Not that you arent holding her had, but if you are not going to hold mine, how am i going to lead us?
I hope we see the importance of you in our lives as much as you do.

God, school is starting soon for me as well. I pray that you will give me an overcomer attitude, to face the pain and hardships. God i have a feeling that the remaining weeks in school is going to be a lot more worse, but again let me take comfort in the knowledge that present suffering brings future hope.
God i pray i will try my best here and now to keep my motivation up, and not lose it. The more i manifest on my future, the less motivated i am of my present circumstances, but remind me that i worship you every day of my life, and not only in the future or coming year.
God let it start here and now, i know i most probably wont be able to fight and push as how i wish i could, with God given super power strength that eats the pain that is placed before me like some glutton, but God help me do this.
I need you.
Been needing you all along, but let my need be amplified, that none of the strength within comes from me but instead from you.
Let me wake up every morning and say, God i will live this day for you.
That i may fulfill the words i sing to you every time i worship.
God we need you.

God let not your mercy and grace depart from her mum. I care, i know you do too. God see all of us through, her sister too.

Admist all, let me sing this song to you, and to remind myself, of your unfailing love.


And there i find you waiting
And there i find release
So with all my heart i worship
And unto to you i sing

For you alone deserve all glory
For you alone deserve all praise


Son, i am here. I have not forgotten you. The number of thoughts i have for you, is as numerous as the stars of the heavens. Son, i have not forgotten you.

Mission trip has been life changing.
Grown, learn lots of stuff.



Going to go JC.
I feel that God is calling me to IJ, and to be a doctor in future.
It does not matter to me, if you believe whatever i proclaim here, cause its my calling not yours.

God light my darkness.

Keep your smile!

Things will get better eventually, wouldn't it be a waste, if you let issues in your life rob you of your smile. Then you move on in life without your smile?
You want to make a difference, keep your smile first, even in the tough times.
God teach us all how to keep our smiles.

Hello everyone, Joey's out of Singapore because he's touching lives of the Orang Asli people! :D Yay continue praying for the mission team alright! I'm proud of you, best friend (:

I have enough of being pushed around, going around begging for a group to accept me.
I still know who i am.
Keeping the smile still.

God i so feel you in my bones now, i feel strengthen, i feel strong, but dear boy remember your strength is from God, and be prepared for the devil, cause he is coming soon, then again, heh, i have God on my side, and i am holding tight to that truth, its a truth! I am taking ownership over this truth, and devil, you ain't gonna take it away from me. Not this time, its been 2 years, since you took it from me, i think you have enough, God just return what is rightfully mine to me, i think you can go play with that plasticine over there, better still go home and sleep.

God i pray i wont lose the lessons i learnt over this separation, i pray she wont lose it too.

God i pray that you would continue to add on to me, that i would yearn for your voice so badly, God even if i only have 2 hours left to sleep, grant me the desire to hunger for you.
God i want to really really take this seriously now, that you would be so apparent to me, and i would really look after my intimacy with you, how i used to, maybe you wanted to keep me in the desert for two years, exactly two years, so i would finally learn to yearn for your presence.

God the music may blast, the sights may overwhelm, but God let my ears and eyes be attuned to you. God make me run like one who is on fire.
You restored that fire, though am now less enthusiastic, but a whole lot more stronger. God let this fire be one that does not waver or wane easily, for you took two years to teach me who you are, and who i am in you.
God i always say this, and i still believe its true...the process of making me grow stinks, totally, but hey, the eventual result of my pain and suffering, totally rocks, uberly totally rocks, i feel so strong now. The fruit is sweet. Whee. Let me boast only in the Lord, and yay...i manage to handle discouragement and depression in a matter of minutes when i took a few days, maybe weeks in the past. YES! Totally rocks, God think i am ready for more, may be painer, but your grace is now really made aware.
I grew, expect a whole lot more from me...i know i asked before if i can do anything nicer, you didn't mention much, but guess God is blessing you through me, i am gonna give all and more than i have to you.
And you know what, God still wins us both? Cause we gave him ourselves, us...Heh.
=)

God no matter where i go, even if i have to stay, its your plan, its not easy to follow, but hey Jesus didn't argue, so who gave me the right to. God humble me please, to treasure your presence, i may not know if i have the fear of God or not, but please promise me you will MAKE me value your presence over Everything else, yes even you. Not sorry to say this, cause when i do treasure God 's presence more, you will get even more love from me.
God its easy to slip away, but i pray you wont have to teach me another lesson on this, i dislike repeated lessons, then again who am i to argue?
God please direct my thoughts, that you are the one who is leading my life, i surrendered it, so why should i go back to the altar and walk back on my promise? God break me, but bring glue along, i will pay for the glue. Its not too expensive right, and i know your glue works on anything, as long as he asks... so here am i asking for your glue, please spare some.
God please constantly probe me with your spirit that your plan overrides all my desires, and if possible, though i know you wont totally abide to this, place desires in me that is according to your plan. (Simply because i know you want to break me as well. )
Desires that bless her, me, and us. God hope that isn't too much to ask for.
God i know i just made a whole list of things that i am begging you for, but let me do so, for who am i to beg from you? God please help me throw away every single thought that tells me i am worthy of doing so, that i am your child and your mercy has accepted me, but instead let me remain a contrite spirit, so that i may treasure your presence, and not take it for granted.
God you have given me the gift of encouraging and teaching, and how i wish you would have taught me to use both these gifts a long time ago on myself, not till today, then again your plan is perfect...so not going to complain...Guard the words that proceed from my lips, and slow my speech.
Hey God, i may crawl to school, i may feel like emotional puke the past few days, and past week, but i learnt how to overcome emotional puke, for your Joy has enabled me to do so. You are strong when i am weak, God maybe i should stop going gym. hee.
God, all in all, i am praying for the both of us, let our love story be one that is written by you and not by us, that it would be an inspiration to others. God bring goodness out of it. EN HUI.
God all this i pray in your name.

God i hope i placed a smile on your face.
Please let me know if i did so.
Every smile, pushes me on.
Your smile pushes me on too.
=)

Dearest, you are appreciated, treasured, valued.
I am proud of you. I am =)

Dont give up in your fight, dear boy.
God taught you to stay on, wait for the later part of the show, cause you never know if you would be in for a surprise.
You are an overcomer, so keep fighting, remember you told yongzilla, stop focusing on your problem, instead your solution, keep your eyes on God.
Remember your confidence is not in men, but in God. You may lose yourself in the world, but know who stands beside you, who is the one who holds you together.
Remember, the joy of the Lord is my strength, strive to put the smile on God's face. When you do so, your pain seems to fizzle away.
Son, remember Jesus went through times whole lot more tougher than you, he pulled through, by perseverance, acquire that spirit.
Remember, stick with your changes and learn from your mistakes, step by step, follow God s plan. Perfect plan. Your life would be nicer that way.
God teach me to do so, to die to my carnal desires and follow your way, to stop fitting you into my life, but instead lay it all down, so you can fit me into your plan.
God, i am an overcomer! Teach me to live like one.

I've grown.
A lot.
Really...A lot.

God i know it will be painful, but i think the only way to grow is to let you break me, but admist all, please don't let me go.
I know, you wont, but please remind me that you wont, that you will stay by my side, walk me through this, and your grace will bring me through the pain. God this pain is allowed by you to build me up, but the grace you give, your faithfulness, will make me stronger.
God be here.
God it is not easy, but i just hope i will remember you are here.
God things haven't been nice to me, but thank you for all the times you see me through.
God remind me that you are holding my hand as you bring me through all this pain and hurts.
Wishes would not save me, the knowledge of your presence will...
I miss you...and i keep thinking about you