I' tell you flat out
It hurts so much
To think of this
So from my thoughts i will exclude
The very thing that
I hate more than everything is
The way I am powerless to dictate my own moods

I've thrown away so many things
That could have been so much more
And i just pray that
My problems go away if they are ignored
But that's not the way it works
No it's not the way it works

When i go down
I go down hard
And i take everything I've learned
And teach myself some disregard
When i go down
It hurts to hit the bottom
And of the things it got my there
I think, if only i had fought them

If and when i can
Clear myself of this clouded mind
I'll watch myself settle down
Into a place where peace can search me out and find
That i am so ready to be found

I've thrown away
The hope i had in friendships
I've thrown away
So many things that could have been so much more
I've thrown away
The secret to find an end to this
And i just pray
That my problems go away
If they are ignored
But that's not the way it works
No it's not the way it works

When i go down
I go down hard
And i take everything I've learned and teach myself some disregard
When i go down it hurts to hit the bottom
And of the things it got me there
I think, if only i had fought them

Any control that i thought i had it just slips right through my hands
While my ever present conscious shakes its head and reprimands me
Reprimands me
Then and there
I confess
I'll blame all this on my selfishness
Yet you love me
And that consumes me
And I'll stand up and again and do so willingly

You give me hope
And hope that gives me life
You touched my heavy heart
And when you do you make it light
As i exhale, i hear your voice
And i answer, thought i hardly make a noise
And from my lips the words i choose to say
Seems pathetic, because its a fallen man's praise
Because i love you
Oh God, i love you
Now life is worth living
If only because of you
And when they say that i am dead and gone
It wont further from the truth