09/11/2008
I am ENTP.
P stands for perspective.
And people who are in that category, are slackers (according to Alex Tee),
are people who will only make decisions when they have everything mapped out in front of them.
Over so many years, i've learn to disregard the P side of me, as i see God's undying grace and unfailing faith work its way into my life.
Now there are many things i can easily leave it to the rationale that,
For A God So Big, Why Not?Note: I used the word many.
Complete faith?
I am glad i waited.
I obeyed, i disciplined myself.
I rid myself of impulsiveness.
--
The year is drawing to a close.
Its time we do some reflections about the entire year, and your entire life.
Compare and contrast the amount of change you went through this year, and from the past few years.
[
I thought i went through a lot in 16, i thought i learnt a lot in 16.
I was wrong
Utterly wrong.
Last year blown me away.
I thought i was done with all the sufferings from last year, and i would not be made to go through so many lessons in one year again.
I was wrong again.
This year was a mindset breaking, stereotyping breaking, socially exposing, faith challenging, grace exploring year.
My perspectives changed a whole lot, and i am fine with it.
Yet i feel dissatisfied to squeeze 3 years worth of experience into a few lines.
I belittled them.
]
My point is:
Expect more from next year.Most probably God will give you more than what you expect.One important thing i learnt from life,
The lessons never stop.
Never.
It just cant.Think beneath the words, there s more to it.
--
I love talking to people who tells me what God told them.
I love to see how God work in their lives.
For those who know you are in this category, you are greatly appreciated.
Its a bit like you are sharing my hobby, talking to God.
--
I am lazy.
I am lazy to pack my room, prepare for moving house.
Lazy to sit myself down and call people whom i know i should call, and have been delaying for so long.
Thank God i dont have a lazy God.
--
I woke up in the morning, opened the red plastic bag trying to find food, it shook.
I jumped back three steps, stared at the red plastic bag, wondering if i was hallucinating.
I asked my mum to check if there was anything in it. Ops wrong move...
It shook again, no earthquake took place and a big ugly monster erupted!
It did not eat my mum up, but she screamed.
The lizard dropped out of the plastic bag later.
I think she is still traumatised by it.
Kinda sad to put her through something like this before she bus off to church.
--
I have yet to step into the dimension of memories and explore it with God.
Maybe review is a better word.
If you let go of a memory, are you moving on, or are you totally forgetting it?
I cant fathom how you can let go and not run the risk of losing the emotion in that memory.
I guess i was fighting so hard not to forget memories, i know i have God to keep all of them, but its these past experiences that made me who i am today.
If i forget them, it would seem like i lost myself, like i dont know why i am like this today.
Its like these memories are a trail, and these trail lead to the beginning point of the whole journey.
I did willingly hurl away some memories, but for those that were significant and had a value, should i let go of them too?
Then again, maybe i should see a little further than that.It was God, and will still be God whose the one that will make me who i am today, and tomorrow.So i am not throwing the one who are creating these memories for me.
So i will still know who i am today, and tomorrow.
--
I tried mathematical linguistics yesterday. (Came up with the term myself)
It was nothing much.
Here goes.
Live free.
If the truth can set you free
And you apply the truth to your life,
Wouldn't you live in freedom?
Live free.
--
Contrive is the word.
Apathy, anticipation, anxiousness, might be other possibilities.
--
I am hungry.
Scintillate, Sparkle, Shine